Psalm 143:8a

Psalm 143:8a

Cause me to hear in the morning your steadfast love,
for in you I trusted.

HEAR HIS STEADFAST LOVE

It was Saturday night. I was tired and discouraged after a long week of ministry with very little progress. The hardest thing was the unwelcomed realization of my compulsion to control and “fix” others rather than just accept them and trust God to work in them. I was convicted and wanted to change, but I felt so down that I dreaded having to be in church the next day.

As I lay in bed crying, I found my heart echoing the prayer of the Psalmist in Ps 143:8, “Cause me to hear … your steadfast love.” I desperately needed to experience God’s khesed— the steadfast love that would not let me go despite my numerous and repeated failings.

I knew that I would not have the strength to face tomorrow without experiencing his love again. As I silently poured out my sadness and emotional fatigue, a strange relief came over me. Somehow it was as though the Lord was whispering, “It’s okay, you can lay this down! Trust in my love, I will take over.”

And take over he really did. I slept well, and when I woke up the next morning I felt like a brand new person. Armed with the sense of God’s unconditional love and acceptance, I was eager to be in church early and to share his khesed with others. During the church school hour, I didn’t even feel that familiar urge to address anybody’s issues. My heart was guided by the love of God, and I was liberated just to be his channel.

Anna Luu
(M.Div., Yr 2)